THE STRAIGHT-HAND SHOOTOUT 2018

F**k Hawaii, the surf contest of all surf contests is coming to Porthleven Pier

We’re extremely excited to announce The Straight-Hand Shootout is coming to Porthleven this Winter.

Unfortunately, despite various efforts to find out, we still have no idea who the organisers are, however there are rumours circulating in the village that Laird Hamilton might have something to do with it. Rumours aside though, here’s a bit more info from what appears to be the The Straight-Hand Shootout’s official facebook page that’s recently popped up….

DONT MESS WITH BENDYS

Posted by Straight-hand Shootout on Saturday, 20 January 2018

“Scheduled to take place this winter, The Straight-Hand Shootout is an annual invitational surf event held at Europe’s premier straight-hander, on the wrong side of  Porthleven Pier.”

Watch this official GoPro Break Breakdown by super hot local female surfer Andrea and you’ll see just how fucking gnarly the pier is…

Go Pro Break Breakdown- Bendys

Scared of surfing Porthleven's- Bendys/Wronguns? YEH YOU FLIPPIN SHOULD BE!! Here is the Go-pro break- breakdown, presented by the lads and local female surfer Andrea, explaining the hazards and showcasing the epic straight-handers on offer at one of the better waves in the UK. BEWARE THE SUCK HOLE .@Will Will Sherlock Robin Thorpe Harry Masters Scott Eastwood Laurence Thornborough Rohan Inglis Carn Pard Burnard Fionn Crow Sam Farmer Adam Scott Scott Eastwood

Posted by Straight-hand Shootout on Monday, 22 January 2018

The elite crew of invitees have been training hard in recent weeks, in particular local shredders Ken Bach and Whyte Dragon have both been risking their lives for a chance of the glory…

Also hotly tipped to win is local dark horse ORCH. When he’s not propping up the bar in the Ship inn, Orchy’s been refining his new move the “Breageside Backslide”. A high tech maneuver which if performed successfully on the day, could see him taking the podium by storm.

A tight race is on the cards, but one thing’s for sure, this is gonna be a big show!

THE WAIT IS ON

According to The Straight-Hand Shootout FB page, the contest will be given the green light as soon as the right conditions prevail. As with all world class surf spots, the right tide is essential, but as luck would have it, it seems the tide’s tend to be best on Saturday’s for the rest of the winter. Which in turn means most competitors will still be slightly drunk from Friday night, thus ensuring competitors fearlessness levels will also be optimum, at their highest point of the week.

For those uninitiated with Cornish culture, May the 8th is Flora Day. One of the biggest drinking days of the Cornish calendar, if not the world’s calendar. Ever since the first surf contest in Porthleven back in the 80s, it’s been strict village tradition that no surf contest is ever allowed to take place on such an important drinking day. In fact, legend has it that anyone found surfing instead of drinking on Flora Day will be punished and banished from the village forever (fortunately we’ve never heard of anyone being reckless enough to do such a thing). Flora Day is also the start of an almighty run of party weekends, so surfing basically goes out of the window after May 8th.

BEWARE THE SUCKHOLE

As fun as it looks, it’s not easy riding Bendy’s, let alone staying on long enough to be in with a chance of a podium place. For those of you unacquainted, the “suckhole” is a small tunnel that runs underneath Porthleven pier from one side to the other. Put there when the pier was built, it was designed to let water drain away and ease the pressure of the waves against the pier. Designed long before surfing as we know it was brought to British shores, this minor detail has unintentionally turned Porthleven pier into one of the gnarliest surf spots this side of Mavericks.

Only last year local charger Alex Wake (aka Nightrider from local rockband Half Kut) was left fighting for his life after getting dragged unexpectedly  into the SUCKHOLE. Being a devout regular at local nightclub Trelawny’s over the years, Al’ is all too familiar with scary experiences, but he assures us this one was next level.

The danger’s not over after the suckhole though. If competitors manage to make it past the 2nd bend, where there’s a good chance of being slammed against the pier, the final challenge is to ride the wave as far as possible into the village, towards the safety of the pubs. However the end of the wave is littered with rocks, so the winner will be whoever can man handle this final section of the beast the longest.

On that note, for all their shortcomings with building the suckhole, Porthleven harbour’s architects definitely hit the nail on the head by building one of the best pubs on the planet overlooking the pier. A set up that with the recent arrival of surf culture, some two centuries later, gives us a natural surfing amphitheater that some say puts even Hawaii’s Pipeline Beach to shame….

WATER SAFETY & ATHLETE SUPPORT

COURTESY OF PORTHLEVEN DRINKING CLUB

To make sure all athletes are suitably lubricated, we’ve heard rumours that local do gooders Porthleven Drinking Club may be pumping up their floating bar in the harbour for the occasion. Apparently it may be hosted by the infamous Sir Laurence of Thornbrough, who”ll be riding down to Cornwall on horseback from his English castle especially for the event. Although completely unverified as wel, we did hear on the grapevine that “PDC” plan to make sure all the athletes needs are fully taken care of so they can be at the top of their game for the benefit of the spectators and local community as a whole.

As you can see from this recent photo of local favourite White Dragon riding one of the biggest straight-handers ever caught at Praa Sands, the stakes are high. White Dragon is at the top of his straight hander game at the moment, so we’re in for a big show.

We’ll tell you more about the event as soon as more rumours come in. In the meantime, keep an eye on the Straight-hand Shootout Facebook page for updates on the contest day.

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  • MAKE CORNWALL GREAT AGAIN – 5 Panel Cap – Red

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  • BEAST WITHIN – Long Sleeve T-shirt – Black

    £26.99
  • BEAST OF BODMIN – T-shirt – Black

    £27.99
  • BEAST OF BODMIN – Trucker Cap – Black

    £22.99
  • CORBLIMEY’S

    £44.99
  • THOR – T-shirt – 4am Grey

    £22.99
  • MAKE CORNWALL GREAT AGAIN – 5 Panel Cap – Black

    £24.99
  • BJ’s

    £44.99
  • TOUR DeBAUCHERY – T-shirt – Camp Turquoise

    £22.99
  • MAKE CORNWALL GREAT AGAIN – 5 Panel Cap – Red

    £24.99
  • BEAST WITHIN – Long Sleeve T-shirt – Black

    £26.99
  • BEAST OF BODMIN – T-shirt – Black

    £27.99
  • BEAST OF BODMIN – Trucker Cap – Black

    £22.99
  • CORBLIMEY’S

    £44.99
  • THOR – T-shirt – 4am Grey

    £22.99
  • MAKE CORNWALL GREAT AGAIN – 5 Panel Cap – Black

    £24.99
  • BJ’s

    £44.99
  • TOUR DeBAUCHERY – T-shirt – Camp Turquoise

    £22.99

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